Monday, December 8, 2008

It has been almost 20 days....

...since we've last posted. Why? Nothing has gone on except wild speculation. Well, little missy, I can't resist myself anymore. Here is what is going to go down at the winter meetings in fabulous Las Vegas:

Jake Peavy: Peavy will be traded to the Cubs for Felix Pie and one of those delicious hot dogs they serve at Wrigley. You know. The ones with the poppy seed buns, sauteed onions, saur kraut, and mustard. Delicious.

CC Sabathia: Sabathia will be signed by the Cardinals (say what!?!). The Cardinals would have recently freed up some salary because they has just traded Albert Pujols to Chunichi Dragons for a container of wontons.

A.J. Burnette: Burnette will sign with the Yankees and promply be traded to the Chicago White Stockings for a young upstart named Joeseph Jackson.

No, I'm not serious about any of these. I am just futher illustrating my point that all of this hearsay and conjecture is making me very anxious for Spring Training. Hell, I'll even take the '09 WBC. I really just need some sort of competitive baseball. Please...

On a more serious note, good luck to Maddux and whatever he decides to do with the rest of his life (he's only 42 and has millions upon millions of dollars, I'm sure he'll be fine). We'll be looking for you in Cooperstown in a few years.