Thursday, May 22, 2008

So, wow, am I the only one?

Ok, so this article here http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/080522 is suppose to be cutting edge, modern day, we get it, I understand the typical obsessed sports fan, funny and witty writing. But I can't get through it, I try but I can't. I think it is really bad. Really, really bad. So, bad I have to break out WTF? Its like Bill Simmons just randomly starts writing absolutely everything that goes through his mind but then puts sentence structure to it.

Here I'll try:
Process map, computer, boobs, globex, emergency, Chris Young, Hyatt, Diet sunkist orange, Hope, pen, seeds, fantasy baseball, broken ankle, business cards, why business cards?, I don't know, job title, American Idol, coffee cup, folder, Cardinals calendar, Hall of fame, Carrie Underwood, no Carrie Underwear, this is wierd, stop, stop now, Tom Hanks, Cast Away.

Ok and scene. See, Simmons does the same thing then writes sentences in between each item. He annoys me tremendously.

4 comments:

Captain Awesome said...

"All right, I'll ask: How come it took three seconds to euthanize Eight Belles, but the WNBA is starting Year 12?" Wow, a WNBA joke...good one Bill Simmons. Good one.

Runningman said...

Yeah, you know I use to make fun of the WNBA quite a bit. My routine was "Even if the NBA is boring at least they still have the mighty dunk, what does the WNBA have...the mighty layup". But since having a daughter I've backed off, what if she's into basketball. I want her to have something she can aspire too.

But I don't think that is your point excatly. Yeah, WNBA joke...way to get all up in it with your wittiness and insight. Plus linking eightbelles to this...too soon, too soon but then again he's edgy, right? Let me guess there's a Chinese Earthquake joke he's just waiting to bust out. Somehow he is going to tie Chein Mein Wan and the Yankees pitching staff to the China Earthquake.

Captain Awesome said...

While we are making jokes nearly 12 years old, let's throw in an Olympic Park bombing joke. WNBA jokes are played out. Who would pat me on the back for a Milli Vanilli joke?

Besides, all WNBA jokes are based on three central themes:
1. Games are agonizing to watch/it's not a real sport
2. The WNBA has only a handful of fans
3. Women can't dunk

I've never heard a WNBA joke outside of these three themes. These references make me cringe.

Johnny-2-Turds said...

...let's throw in an Olympic Park bombing joke...

Ask and you shall receive (after a quick google search):

Richard Jewell is alive and planning to sue everyone who reports otherwise.

Richard Jewell is dead. You know who probably killed him? Richard Jewell!!

You set 'em up, I'll knock 'em down, buddy.